We live in a world where there are so many demands on our time, energy, money, etc… it’s nearly impossible to meet all of life’s demands. If life’s demands meet someone who is naturally hard on themselves, it can be brutal.
Do you have unrelenting standards for yourself? According to “Schema Therapy” Psychology Unrelenting Standards are defined as:
The underlying belief that one must strive to meet very high internalized standards of behavior and performance, usually to avoid criticism. Typically results in feelings of pressure or difficulty slowing down; and in hyper criticalness toward oneself and others. Must involve significant impairment in: pleasure, relaxation, health, self-esteem, sense of accomplishment, or satisfying relationships.
Does this sound like you? You’re not alone.
At the Home of Martha and Mary
As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one.Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Unfortunately, i relate more to Martha than to Mary. Martha was WORKING for Jesus while Mary was WITH Jesus. Who chose better?
We don’t need to “work” for God’s approval, we can just hang out with him.
Who do you relate more to? Martha or Mary?
Are you spending quality time with God? If not, i want to encourage you to spend some time with God praying, talking to him, thinking about him, or meditating on a particular scripture.
You will find all the approval you need and the strength to do whatever God is placing before you.
Lastly, please give yourself a break! Lowering the expectations you place on yourself will do you more good in your life than keeping them so high. Are you being your own best friend?
For general information about potential barriers to growth in your life, please check this out:
If you would like any PDF files about where these Schema’s come from in our childhood and how we can work on them, please me know and i can send you some information.